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Hell Week Day 4 and 5: Stepping Out of Your Comfort Zone and Rest

Written by Elena @The Art of Making a Baby. Posted in BUSY MOM TIPS, EVERYTHING ELSE, FOR MOMS, HEALTH, Health and Fitness

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This is a sponsored post written by me on behalf of Erik Bertrand Larssen for IZEA. All opinions are 100% mine.

I am entering into the second half of my Hell Week challenge based on the book, Hell Week: 7 Days to Be Your Best Self by Erik Bertrand Larssen that can be bought on Amazon. I think everyone needs to take this challenge and I have been writing about it all week. I introduced the book and the challenge, I wrote about how I prepped for Hell Week and I have given a play by play for each day here: Day 1, Day 2, Day 3. Each day has presented a new focus and a new way to stretch myself and Day 4 was no different.

Day 4 started exactly like its name. I woke up to no Internet. No internet means no productivity and working. It seems like every little thing that could go wrong to sabotage my Hell Week Challenge this week went wrong, from food poisoning to a rained out volleyball and consequent late night of playing and having to go to sleep late. Now with the internet out, I can’t get everything I planned on doing done. It’s making me laugh right now as I write about it. You wanted me to step out of my comfort zone? I think the universe kind of took care of that by throwing everything it could at me this week to PREVENT me to getting things done. If there was any doubt in my mind on whether I would repeat the Hell Week, it’s no longer there.

I am repeating the damn challenge as soon as I am back from my Minnesota trip for 4th of July.

On Thursday I was supposed to pull an all-nighter. As I wrote earlier that wasn’t feasible at the moment because I have to take care of Lexi, drive her an hour to camp and an hour back and play volleyball Friday evening (when I would have been up for over 24 hours). However I really want to do it (I love all-nighters). So I am going to do it Saturday night and I am pretty excited.

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I dropped Lexi off at school on Thursday morning and went straight to the gym, pushing as hard as I could, working out. Then I spend the day at a local organic restaurant working (doing specifically something I had planned for hell week).

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Then we spent a nice calm evening playing and went to bed at the right time. Very simple good day.

Day 5, Friday, was meant to be a rest day after the all nighter, but since I didn’t do the all nighter, I treated it like any other day. Once again I had Lexi on Friday so my work time was limited. I had to work out of a cafe so that I had access to the Internet, got a decent amount of work done.

I find it extremely challenging to be hyperfocused when I know I only have a few hours of work, before having to return to mommy mode. And it’s even more challenging to be hyper focused IN MOMMY mode. Being a mommy and being a super productive worker are on completely opposite spectrums of mental function.  Not doing intellectual or intensely physical activities (like playing kid games) is energy draining for me (I am sure many mommies can relate that a day of playing Legos and talking about characters can be mind numbing), so I sort of turn off and that makes me tired. I need to find a way to get into hyperfocused mode when I am a mom, not just during work. I can tell that it is going to take more than a week to find that strength and get into the zone, but this is a good start and a good motivator for me.

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So when I picked Lexi up, I forced myself to come up with a new activity rather than just go with what we know.

On the way home, we made a detour to a local PetSmart to go see pets. Lexi is at the stage where he is in love with little animals and has been asking for a little kitty as well as obsessively petting our cats at home, so this was a great trip. She squealed and awwwww’ed and was just absolutely enthralled by the little kittens and fish and mice and hamsters she saw at the store. This was a good spur of the moment trip. On the way home, instead of listening to music or playing the old and tired iSpy game, we played the game of calling out letters and coming up with words that start with that letter, as well as describing of things and trying to guess what we are trying to describe. She did surprisingly well at both of those games and got exponentially better the more we played ( we have a 40 min to an hour drive home from her camp). I felt better about actually engaging into things actively rather than passively, but I still think there is room for improvement, that I can push myself further to be better in mommy mode.

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Friday is my volleyball day, and I was set at being focused and pushing myself further than usual. As a result, I won every single game of the evening except for the last one ( we usually play about 8 games back to back in the course of the evening). Another proof that I don’t give it my all consistently and when I do, I can see the results.

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At 9:15pm I rushed home, took a quick shower to wash off all the sticky wet sand and was in bed by 10:30pm.
Overall, I think I had a successful day in terms of the #hellweekchallenge, but I can’t help it but feel that I could push even more, do even better. I feel like this could become my every day mode, a better improved. But I want to really feel the pain doing the challenge. I guess the simple fact that I did not need to change my eating or exercising habits automatically makes it much easier, but I want to really feel challenged and persevere.

Today is Saturday, the all-nighter, I am very excited to see how it will go. I will need lots of coffee.

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Hell Week Challenge Day 3: Planning

Written by Elena @The Art of Making a Baby. Posted in BUSY MOM TIPS, FOR MOMS, HEALTH, Health and Fitness

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This post brought to you by Erik Bertrand Larssen. The content and opinions expressed below are that of The Art of Making a Baby.

This week, I am taking the Hell Week Challenge based on the book Hell Week: Seven Days To Be Your Best Self by Erik Bertrand Larssen that can be bought on Amazon . If you haven’t already, go back and catch up with my other posts. I explained what the challenge is about and why you should do it. I walked through my preparation for the Hell Week Challenge and I showed you how Day 1 and Day 2 went for me. I’ve completed Day 3 and here is what happened.

Ok, maybe this isn’t exactly hellish but life makes it hard to stay on top of things.

Hell Week Day 2: Get in the Mode

Written by Elena @The Art of Making a Baby. Posted in BUSY MOM TIPS, FOR MOMS, GET FIT, HEALTH, Health and Fitness

Photo Jun 21, 3 47 49 PM

This is a sponsored post written by me on behalf of Erik Bertrand Larssen. All opinions are 100% mine.

I hope you have been following along with me for my Hell Week Challenge based on the book Hell Week: Seven Days to Your Best Self by Erik Bertrand Larssen. I introduced you to what Hell Week is all about, I talked about how I prepared for this challenge and I share how Day 1 went for me. If you want to get ready for your own Hell Week Challenge, order a copy of the book from Amazon. Use the hashtags #hellweekchallenge and #hellweektaomab to share your experience. I would love to follow along with you.

Hell Week Day 2

Wow this was rough! Not because it’s Hell Week, but because I was feeling sick. It started last night after I played 2 hours of volleyball. I just felt nauseous, so I left early (normally we play for 3 hours), I barely made it home and went straight to bed with Lexi, by 10 pm as I am supposed to. I couldn’t have stayed up if I wanted to.

Hell Week Day 1: Habits

Written by Elena @The Art of Making a Baby. Posted in BUSY MOM TIPS, EVERYTHING ELSE, FOR MOMS, GET FIT, HEALTH, Health and Fitness

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This is a sponsored post written by me on behalf of Erik Bertrand Larssen for IZEA. All opinions are 100% mine.

If you have been reading my latest posts, you know I am participating in the Hell Week Challenge based off the book “Hell Week: 7 Days to Be Your Best Self” by Erik Bertrand Larssen. I explained what Hell Week is all about and shared about my experience preparing to take the Hell Week Challenge. If you want to join me or start your own Hell Week Challenge next week, grab a copy of this super helpful book from Amazon.

 

If you are completing the challenge with me, be sure to use #HellWeekChallenge and #HellWeekTAOMAB so I can follow along with you!

Hell Week Challenge Prep

Written by Elena @The Art of Making a Baby. Posted in BUSY MOM TIPS, EVERYTHING ELSE, FOR MOMS, HEALTH, Health and Fitness

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This is a sponsored post written by me on behalf of Erik Bertrand Larssen for IZEA. All opinions are 100% mine.

This week I am taking the HELL WEEK challenge from the book Hell Week: Seven Days to Be Your Best Self Now by Erik Bertrand Larssen that can be purchased on Amazon if you’d like to participate with me. I introduced the book, why I am taking the challenge and what I hope to achieve through the challenge in THIS POST. I hope some of you are going to join me in the challenge and have ordered your own copy of the book. You can grab it on Amazon if you have not already.

Before HELL WEEK can start, there are some preparations you have to do. This is laid out in the book and I want to share how I prepared for my HELL WEEK challenge that starts on Monday. I am so excited!

Hell Week Challenge: What it is and why you should do it

Written by Elena @The Art of Making a Baby. Posted in BABY, BUSY MOM TIPS, Daily, FOR MOMS, HEALTH, Health and Fitness, LIFE

HELL WEEK

This post brought to you by Erik Bertrand Larssen. The content and opinions expressed below are that of The Art of Making a Baby.

I have been SO GIDDY about participating in the Hell Week challenge since I found out about. I don’t think I have ever been so excited to write a late night post about anything ever before.

If you follow me on Instagram (and you should), you have seen me sitting around with a book. Not just any book. This one: HELL WEEK: Seven Days to Be Your Best Self by Erik Bertrand Larssen

I would like to talk a bit about what this book is about, why I am reading it and participating in the challenge and why I think you should join me (if not for anything but for the fun of doing a challenge together)

Sometimes it’s better to just part ways…

Written by Elena @The Art of Making a Baby. Posted in EVERYTHING ELSE

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I wanted to wait to write this post until things were closer to being final…

As some of you have noticed, Andrew and I have not been together for quite a while now. And while I do not think it is fair to him for me to discuss specifics on the internet, I wanted to wait until the divorce was close to final to let you, guys, know about it here. Partly because many of you have followed our lives from the beginning, partly because I know many families are going through the same thing and most importantly because it’s not a subject widely discussed or talked about. And it should be.

No decision to separate a marriage or a long term relationship is easy. And I have to say that I agonized over it for months, if not a year. That consume most of the year 2014 and a bit of 2015. I know many women who are in the position I was, some with fewer options. For me, the realization that I was not happy in my marriage came on slowly. I did not know what was wrong at first. I felt like I was trapped with no way to get out and simply unhappy. I wanted something more. Something different. It took me MONTHS to understand what I was feeling and what it was connected to. And then MONTHS again, to make a solid decision that I wasn’t going back and forth on.

I can’t discuss the whys here. It wouldn’t be fair to Lexi’s dad. I can say it was very hard to fully decide on divorce because of our 13 years together and because of Lexi, but when the decision was made, it felt right.  I do not blame anyone. I feel it was irreconcilable differences ( as silly as it sounds). I realized that what I needed to grow and to be a better person and to achieve something in life wasn’t necessarily what I had or what I wanted.

Almost 2 years after the conversation about divorce started, we have finally managed to find the time to file the paperwork. (It was never a priority to have it official, because we were already separated emotionally). We agree on everything when it comes to the separation. We both hope that for the sake of Lexi and our own relationship, we can stay amicable. I don’t hold anything against him, and hope to stay friends and parents and hope that with time he will not hold anything against me.

How will this affect Lexi in terms of seeing her mom and dad?

We have been practicing co-parenting for 1.5 years now. 50/50 mom and dad. It started due to our work schedules even before we were sure that we wanted to get separated, and then morphed into a full on co-parenting deal on a 50/50 basis. As far as we can tell, Lexi has not noticed a difference. She sees mommy and daddy equal amounts of time. We are hoping that we can still take vacations together, as his work allows ( I am more flexible than Andrew), celebrate holidays together, come to recitals and games together. Our goal is to keep a united front and do what is best for Lexi in the face of a not-so-ideal situation. I know Andrew has been missing from the pictures, but he is not missing from her life. We just don’t take many of all three of us anymore.  We will be moving into separate houses, I am getting a rental condo or house by August. Looking at many properties right now, maybe I will record my journey.

While it was a very hard decision, I have to say I have not been this happy with my life for a very long time. It’s hard, and it’s frustrating at times, but I have a free, happy feeling inside of me that I haven’t felt in years. And it certainly gets projected onto my daughter.

I know many women out there felt the same: trapped, unhappy with the person they are with, confused, not sure if there is a way out. I felt all those things for a long time until I started making my way out. Emotionally, financially…. Sometimes two people just gotta go. For their sake, for the sake of their children. Sometimes happy parents apart are better than lifeless, angry parents together. It’s never an easy decision, but I think taking your time to make it, without emotions, using logic, can help make the right one.

I want to write about it in a way that would help other women going through the same decision making process, but I am concerned about giving away too much that would hurt the other party. I do not know where to draw that line, so I am staying somewhat vague.

It’s not worth it to spend your life with someone who you don’t love and who doesn’t make you happy, for any reason, financial, kids, social stigma, etc

I would rather be alone.

And it’s not good to be with someone who doesn’t love you. Because everyone deserves being loved.

Many people were confused, we seemed so happy together. And we were for many years. With lots of ups and downs. But in the last 2-3 years. there was a deep seated feeling that just grew and grew and became clear once the divorce option came into focus.

That being said, I still love Andrew as Lexi’s dad, even though I might disagree with him on a lot of things. We are still very alike ( as much as we are different). He is an excellent dad to Lexi and our parenting styles match really well. He loves Lexi more than anything in this world and that means a universe to me. I want to be friends and help him and spend time with our daughter together. I just can’t be in it in a romantic way. I hope that we can grow our friendship even further when the dust settles, because as long as he doesn’t have hard feelings, I would love to care about him as a friend and Lexi’s dad.

What I can say to those going through the thoughts or the process and needing support is it’s ok. It really is. Whether the decision is mutual, or one of you is leaving, it is for the best.  There is no reason to be with a person who you do not love, or with a person who does not love you. There is always a better way. Take your time. Listen to your feelings. Prepare for your new life if needed and most importantly, try and do it amicably. I know it’s not always possible or in your control. It’s not bad, it’s just a fact of life. Things change, people change, feelings change. We all just want to be happy and need to find that happiness.

Just heads up for everyone: I realize you probably have a million questions and comments. I know many of you had for months now. As much as I would love to answer them, this will be the only post about this matter. I really really want to just pour my heart out on the blog about every detail of the separation and things that frustrate me and things that make me happy. But I can’t. It’s public and I don’t want anyone’s feelings hurt. I just wanted to officially talk about it now that we finally got around to filing our divorce papers. By around August we expect it all to be complete. We didn’t need lawyers, we agreed on everything, so now off to make our new lives. In the future, I might touch on co-parenting and such, but right now while things are still fresh, I would rather respect Andrew’s privacy and not say too much.

I will not answer questions, comment on the matter. I do not want any negativity around this change, I’ve been consistent in that I am a positive person and don’t tolerate negativity around me. I do not want any condolences, because this change is a good change. I do not need any advice because it’s no one’s place to give it without being asked. And I cannot give any advice because every situation is different and it is not MY place to give it, as much as I would like to help others. If you feel like you want to say something or extend support to both of us, say “I wish you happiness and glad you did what is best for all three of you”. That is all I need. I wish I could do more but it is a touchy subject and it is best if it’s not carried away with. Thank you  for respecting that :)

If you do wish to say something, send me a personal email. I can’t promise I will respond but I will read it :) contact at prebabyblog dot com

We will be moving soon and we are still traveling a lot, so I am going to continue trying to post here regularly even though life is temporarily going to get busy. (keyword try)

Lexi has just started summer camp which will give both of us some time to get caught up, which I am excited about.

I wanted to say Thank you for following our family throughout the years. I appreciate all the supporters. I will continue writing about our new lives and loves and adventures. I am not sure if I will be open about my personal romantic life, as not everyone is okay with being in public like that but I am sure you will see updates and pictures on social media. Things are just getting to be interesting….

I will be sharing more of my and Lexi life together, our search for a new house, our travels, about her school, our routines, my favorite things, her favorite things, my parenting, my struggles, everything and anything involved. I will be writing about fitness and nutrition and personal growth and improvement  I have been big on. Things that help and hinder me. Everything I struggle with and my little wins. Work more with my favorite brands to bring you giveaways and freebies. Do more regular series of different posts. I am excited! Excited to share more. (Now that Lexi is in school, I will have more time)

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Feel free to follow us on social media as well, of course! ;)

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SEE KAI RUN STYLES SPRING SUMMER 2016

Written by Elena @The Art of Making a Baby. Posted in Best for Baby, Fashion and Outfits, PHOTO, Photo Stories, PRODUCTS, TODDLER

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Given how much we love See Kai Run shoes, Lexi and I went out with some of our favorite styles and did a little look book for the blog featuring spring/summer sneakers, sandals and water shoes.

Now that Lexi is older, I can actually ask her for a detailed opinion on things she wears and plays with, so I think from now on, I will include two sections: mom’s opinion and Lexi’s opinion.

Mom’s opinion:

See Kai Run have always been one of the two brands that I got for Lexi because of the good fit and comfort. However, I am also incredibly impressed with original designs they come out with every season. My biggest soft spot is for their sneakers. The combination of patterns and colors is nothing that you normally see in footwear. I would personally wear them if they came in a larger size ( See Kai Run, please?) I have always disliked the look of tennis shoes for any situation other than the gym and these sneakers cut that perfect line between being sporty, comfy and yet stylish.

It also helps that See Kai Run has sales regularly and you can get their shoes for a really good price.

Lexi’s Opinion:

From her behavior I have noticed that she really prefers sandals. First, they are very easy to put on ( velcro!), so she can do it herself. She is a girly girl when it comes to fashion (skirts and sandals are her staples), so of course she prefers more girly options. This year See Kai Run has really nice water shoes ( machine washable and safe for water) and it has thrilled her to such a degree to be able to attack any puddle she comes across in these shoes. “Mom, are these water shoes? Can I jump?”

Out of Lexi’s mouth: ” I really like sandals better because they are like flip flops, easy to put on. ”

( all outfits are by Lourdes)


 

So enjoy the visuals below and enter the giveaway. Check out the upcoming sales –

  • For Memorial Day, See Kai Run has 30% off Spring Summer Sneakers.
  • Starting June 1st, they will be adding Spring Summer Sandals to the 30% off sale.
  • On June 8th, the savings get even bigger with 30% off all other Spring Summer styles. The 30% off ends on June 14th.
  • Be on the lookout in June for their Clearance Page Sale, where we will be offering big discounts on past season styles. You will be able to “Find your size and save BIG!”

Be sure to sign up for the See Kai Run newsletter at their website so you can be the first to know about special products, promotions and sales. You get 10% off your next purchase of $40.00 or more when you sign up as well.

GIVEAWAY

You can enter a giveaway for 1 pair of See Kai Run shoes below ( 2 winners)

a Rafflecopter giveaway

 

 

Noel

Peyton

  

Mykah

Kira

Poppy Avalon

Magnuson

Arcadia

My new business, Melody Lane, and how it started.

Written by Elena @The Art of Making a Baby. Posted in BABY, BUMP UPDATES, Daily, EVERYTHING ELSE, Fashion and Outfits, FOR MOMS, Friday Finds, Fun as a Toddler Mom, FUN TIMES, GET FIT, Health and Fitness, LIFE, My Pregnancy, New Mom Experience, Nursery, Other Recommendations, PHOTO, Photo Stories, Pre-CONCEPTION, PREGNANCY, PREGNANCY FASHION, Pregnancy Q of the week, Pregnant With Style, PRODUCTS, TODDLER, Tried and True

ML

THE WHOLE STORY

Some of you who follow me on IG might have noticed me mentioning Melody Lane  a few times and I am sure you saw the announcement  and I have finally found the time to talk about it and give you some background information on how it came to life and what it is. ( and a coupon just for my readers at the end)